Rachael Asselin’s Story

How has your grief changed over time?

For Rachael Asselin, grief has never been one single thing.

It changes.

It circles back.

It shows up in new ways as life moves forward.

“As these motherless moms, we re-grieve every time,” Rachael says.

“We grieve every milestone because we think about the milestones we didn’t have,” she says.

There is gratitude in those moments too. Every milestone with her own children feels like a gift. But that joy can exist alongside sadness.

“We grieve in so many different layers as we parent,” she says.

 

What does it mean to have outlived your mother?

Rachael is now in a place she describes as strange and complicated.

She has outlived her mother.

Her mother died at 45, and Rachael no longer has a benchmark for what comes next.

“I feel like I’m blazing a trail,” Rachael says.

As an adult woman, she sometimes finds herself wishing she could ask her mother ordinary questions about aging, motherhood, womanhood, and change. She wonders when certain things happened for her mother or what her mother might have experienced at this stage of life.

But there is no one to ask.

“I don’t have a benchmark past the age of 45,” Rachael says.

Even though she was young when her mother died, Rachael still had some sense of where her mother was in her life. Now, she is living beyond that point, navigating a phase her mother never got to model for her.

That absence is its own kind of grief.

 

How does grief come back through friendship?

Rachael has also found herself revisiting her own loss as more of her friends begin losing parents.

For many of them, parent loss is happening at a more expected stage of life. But for Rachael, watching friends walk through those early days brings her back to her own experience.

It makes her think about what she needed then.

It makes her wonder what she can offer now.

“What can I do for them that I would have wanted?” she says.

That reflection feels deeply connected to Runway’s work. Rachael knows how often support arrives immediately after a loss, only to fade as other people return to their regular lives.

“The first couple weeks, everyone’s there for you, and then it all dries up,” she says.

But grief does not end when the casseroles stop, the texts slow down, or the world moves on.

That understanding is part of why Rachael believes so deeply in the importance of continued support for families.

 

What does Runway’s 20th Anniversary mean to you?

Rachael is proud of what Runway has become.

She was not there at the very beginning, but she became involved early enough to see the organization grow from something small and heartfelt into something far-reaching and deeply impactful.

“I am so proud of what Runway has been able to do,” Rachael says.

In the early years, Runway felt like a meaningful event that could raise money for a good cause and support families in some way. But over time, the organization has evolved into something much bigger.

For Rachael, what makes Runway different is the feeling in the room.

“There is something so unique and palpable about the room at that Runway event that I’ve never experienced before in any other event I’ve been to,” she says.

What makes Runway’s work so meaningful?

Runway found a need that was not being met and built something to fill it.

Today, Runway provides meaningful support for families impacted by breast cancer, metastatic disease, and loss — the kind of support that continues after the first wave of help fades.

Rachael is an important part of that work, serving as Chair of Family Grants on the Runway Board.

When she first became involved, she saw herself primarily as a daughter who had lost her mother. Now, through her role on the board, Rachael is able to help support children and families navigating the illness or loss of their own mothers.

Runway is not just something she attends. It is something she believes in.

Even after all these years, the work still feels meaningful. It still feels personal. It still feels worth showing up for.

This year, we are excited to celebrate Rachael not only as a Legacy Model, but as someone who has given so much of herself to this community and helped shape the support Runway offers to families when they need it most.